After a month of not writing a damn thing for Escape Velocity, I’m back. It’s time to set aside things that have been dragging me down and use them to fuel the word-movie in my head that has been begging to be told.
After reading PaxCorpus, again, I noticed one of the things I do most is I go into major detail about what Dante happens to be doing during an “action” sequence. You know:
I aim my gun forward, eyes through the scope, pulling the trigger. Side-step here, back to the wall there.
My biggest fear about my work is being repetitive. I feel that it can be dull to the reader after a certain length of time.
I’ve also gone back and made a few small edits to certain bits of detail. Things I believe would maybe make the reader feel as if I think he or she is stupid. I want to avoid that, because I know none of you are stupid.
So here’s how I started the next chapter of EV. It’s an action sequence, but done a little differently. I’m wondering if you can still tell what’s going on, but I feel the passage diverts from the repetitive.
I chew on a stick of gum. Keeps the static in my head at bay and makes it easier to aim. A painting of black, red and gun-steel flush like a waterfall all around me. Each crack of each pistol is a snap of the viscous latex between my teeth.
The only thought in my head is her.
Why is it that every problem in your life is the result of a woman?
Clenched hands cover the sides of my head and I hurl myself into a ball just beyond a balcony that looks down into a sea of confusion and murder as gunfire, sure as fuck aimed for my face, slaps against the concrete barrier that separates me from the intruders.






Feed to the Back
Hey people! I’ve put together a PDF version of what I’ve written so far for the sequel to PaxCorpus. I’m going to share the link here and, if you feel like reading through a handful of chapters, let me know what you think! I’m looking to get an idea of what other people think of the direction the Pax Series is going. This may or may not influence me along the path to completion of Escape Velocity.
Escape Velocity – PDF – Rough Draft (so far)
As always, thank you.